Rediscovering You After Motherhood

Why Taking Time For Self-Care is Essential to Finding Balance as a Mom

Article by Melissa Rogne

Photography by Yvonne Denault Photography

Originally published in Fargo Lifestyle

I became a mother in 2008, at 34 years of age. It was, without a doubt, as life-changing as everyone had warned me. I was prepared for much of it: the lack of sleep, the intense love for this tiny little human, the uncertainty of feeding schedules, naps, and diaper rash. 

What I wasn’t prepared for is the change in me. I was already an entrepreneur, Rejuv had been open for over three years and was thriving. I loved work—my patients, my team, the innovation, and the challenges. 

The first day I went back to work after maternity leave, I cried all the way there. By the second week, I was begging my husband to let me sell my business so I could stay home with my new baby boy. I will never forget the look of sheer panic and confusion on his face. I’m sure he was wondering the exact same thing as I was; who had I become?

It took a long time for me to find the balance between the person I had been for 34 years and this new person, this mother. In the long run, I didn’t sell my business. I received the support I needed to work through my feelings and am incredibly grateful for the outcome. My son, now 11, is happy, healthy, and loves the fact that his mom has a “cool business.”

In my line of work, I hear so often, “I am finally taking care of myself. It’s been all about the kids for so long.” Mothers have a natural tendency to lose our identity, including our focus on self-care, and give all that we have to our children. 

I learned a powerful lesson early on that when I feel good, I’m a better mother. Taking time to care for yourself is one of the most challenging and essential parts of motherhood. Self-care is different for everyone. For some, it's time spent at the gym. Others look forward to a lunch date with a good friend or getting pampered with a relaxing facial. Whatever it is, the goal is always the same: to boost your spirit, your confidence, and your wellness. 

One day, I hope my daughter also has the intense joy of becoming a mother. I will prepare her. I will let her know that becoming a mother does not mean she is less important. It means that she needs to make herself a priority because there is a little person out there who needs her to be her best. 

To all you mothers, you are absolutely incredible. Be proud of the amazing kids you are raising. In case no one has told you lately, you are doing a great job!

Taking time to care for yourself is one of the most challenging and essential parts of motherhood.

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