A new school year isn’t just about fresh notebooks, the thrill of new schedules, or that “first-day fit” your kid begged for from TikTok. It’s about something even more essential: the return of the daily identity parade that is childhood and pre-adulting. And let’s be honest, school is less a runway and more a psychological jungle gym.
At East Cobb Counseling, we believe style is more than just what your child wears — it’s how they show up in the world. It’s the way they express thoughts, ask questions, handle conflict, or wear dinosaur socks unapologetically in the 5th grade, or one argyle sock and one stripe sock (on purpose) in high school. In short: style is self-expression in motion.
Style is how kids express themselves. It’s the quiet confidence in raising a hand in class. It’s telling a joke at the lunch table. It’s solving a problem creatively or asking for help without shame. And yes, sometimes it is accessorizing with 47 bracelets or a hoodie in 92-degree heat — because, you know, it “vibes”.
The Expanded Meaning of Style
Clothing may be the outer layer, but real style? That’s what’s going on underneath. Whether your child is 7, 17, or navigating college orientation, true style includes:
• The way they treat others
• How they respond to failure or frustration
• Their curiosity and creativity
• The confidence to be a little different
• And how they align with their values (even if it’s just refusing to wear itchy pants)
When students are empowered to be themselves - awkward, awesome, and evolving - their confidence grows. That’s not just a fashion win; it’s a mental health one.
Style as Confidence, Not Comparison
Let’s be real, comparison is not just everywhere, it can also truly be the thief of joy. In elementary school, it might be over light-up shoes. In middle school, who made the cheer squad. In high school, it’s GPA, GPAs, and who’s driving a new Bronco. And college? Try “Who’s already landed an internship and a fully monetized side hustle.”
According to research from the Journal of Child and Adolescent Psychology, self-esteem in youth plummets when comparison trumps self-expression. That’s why it’s so important we shift the message:
“Confidence is cultivated when kids feel safe to explore who they are, not just what they wear.”
This means encouraging kids and teens to own their weird, embrace their differences, and recognize that the most stylish people are rarely the most conforming ones, they’re the most authentic.
How to Help Kids of All Ages Show Up Authentically
• Praise qualities, not trends: Compliment courage, creativity, or resilience over appearance.
• Normalize growth and change: It’s okay for a middle schooler to reinvent their personality every semester. That’s development, not drama.
• Model authenticity: Share your own awkward style phases, career changes, or lessons learned from failing hard.
• Create safety at home: Your child’s self-expression should be celebrated, even if their fashion choices resemble “wrinkled pajama pants with crocs.” Or on the other extreme, “$200 jeans that look the exact same as the $30 variety. The truth is, the bigger picture is not about jean or the croc, but the kid in them.
Final Thoughts
Back-to-school isn’t just a wardrobe reset. It’s a chance to step into who you’re becoming.
Let’s teach kids of all ages that the best style is one that fits them. That the real flex isn’t fitting in but standing out. And that confidence? It’ll never go out of style.
Lastly, if you recognize that your kid is struggling or lacking the skills to creatively work through the pressures of school, social, familial or sport demands, the team at East Cobb Counseling are here to help.
East Cobb Counseling is located at 3535 Roswell Road, Marietta, GA 30062.
Website: eastcobbcounseling.com • Phone: 678-263-4211