Imagine arriving in a new country, learning a new culture, and finding yourself in a city where you know almost no one. Then fall arrives and its holiday season. You’ve heard about Thanksgiving, perhaps studied its history, but you've never experienced the ritual of gathering around a table with an American family. For international students at the University of Nevada, Reno, Mike Cutler and the volunteers of Reno International House are helping change that.
Over the past 20+ years, Cutler and others have reached out to hundreds of international students and invited them to experience Thanksgiving and all it entails in the American culture.
“When we hear about and see someone who may be alone for Thanksgiving, we feel, and rightfully so, compassion for that person,” Cutler says. “It’s a holiday where everyone gets together with families. No one should be alone. With international students that might not be as big a deal because they don’t understand the significance. They don’t really feel the depth or feel the same feeling we would.
“But nobody wants to be alone. For me, this is about my faith. I’m a Christian and the way I read the bible, God wants us to welcome others, regardless of their country of origin or culture. Going to school, I lived with international students. It opened my eyes. We can be friends.”
Cutler, a Reno resident, attended Nevada in the early 2000s. He did live with some international students, but it was his marketing professor, Kyung Ghynn, also not originally from the states, that may have made the biggest impact.
“He invited me to help him with an annual international dinner—a Thanksgiving banquet. He remembered how lonely it felt being alone. He knew that feeling first-hand. He vowed, even as a tenured professor, he’d do whatever he could to make the international students feel welcome. I kept it going after a few years when he moved back to Korea.”
Cutler is not alone in his local efforts. Volunteers with the International House spread the holiday cheer as well. Kathy Secrist, who has been volunteering with the group since 2021, jumped on the bandwagon of giving back, too. She pointed out that with ‘Turkey Day’ being new to foreigners, many have differing levels of their understanding of the American holiday.
“It really depends on what they’ve watched before in terms of TV and movies,” says Secrist, who hosts dinners with her husband Mark and daughter Elissa. “We definitely explain why we do it as a family. It’s not just an American tradition. It’s just more about living life with gratitude… I’ve always had a heart for people from other countries. Having the opportunity to host people from other countries in our home is great. We get to be with these young people without going across the globe. That has been really impactful for me.”
Thanksgiving can certainly offer different strokes for different folks. Cutler admits he’s not much into the traditional holiday foods of turkey, stuffing, cranberry sauce, and others. He said his November get togethers are far from the norm.
“I’m not a huge fan of the traditional turkey dinner,” Cutler quips. “So, it’s a chance to do something different and fun, maybe an international food… Last year, we explained the holiday. Usually, we’ll have an icebreaker question about a similar holiday. Every country seems to have a holiday or two where the family comes together.”
“We actually like to host where all the guests participate in cooking the meal. Early on, I made the mistake of trying to entertain, but the students aren’t interested in sitting in the living room and watching us be busy. If we all make the meal together, we’ve found that’s what works best for us.”
Preparing the meal as a group is not unique to Cutler’s crew.
“We usually have students come early before meal and let them be a part of making different dishes,” Secrist says. “That creates conversations. We can ask them about traditional meals around their holidays and explain why we do the dishes we do. Every family does it different. This helps them understand our family and culture.”
What seems to be universal for families and guests is the sense of community that comes from these holiday meals. Families and students alike seem to enjoy the time together and sharing of cultures.
Amal Kushwaha, 33, is a PhD student studying at UNR from Uttar Pradesh, India. He’s been a holiday guest at the Secrists a time or two.
“I came here in 2021 for my master’s program,” he says. “That’s when I met the international group and all these wonderful people… When I look at these people inviting others over and helping, that’s a great way of bonding. It goes way beyond. I’ve known Kathy for five years. This entire journey has transformed me. Now I’m very active in the international group. It creates a compounding effect.”
And it’s not only international students benefiting. Cutler, who now teaches at the University, has become good friends with fellow instructor Ming Chen, who teaches in the Materials Sciences and Engineering Program. He taught previously at the University of Illinois and lectured at Northwestern University in suburban Chicago. He says his Reno experience has been special.
“I still remember my first day in Reno, when Mike picked me up at the airport and drove me to the (rental) house,” Chen says. “He was very kind and offered a great deal of help and support, which meant a lot to me as someone settling into a new city.
“What Mike’s family and the others do, it is a wonderful thing. For someone starting a new life in an unfamiliar city or country, an invitation like this offers much more than a holiday meal. It is an opportunity to make friends, experience a new tradition, and feel included.”
Sometimes the holiday meal is an initial invitation. Other times, it’s a corresponding block in building the foundation of continuing friendship. Rarely is the Thanksgiving meal a “one-and-done” meeting.
“Because we have so many different students that attended holiday and Sunday dinners, I’ve built hundreds of relationships over the last five years,” Secrist says. “We met students from Costa Rica, Bangladesh, Cameroon, Ghana… We want to get the students off campus. We want these times to feel more like family, more like home.”
"For someone starting a new life in an unfamiliar city or country, an invitation like this offers much more than a holiday meal. It is an opportunity to make friends, experience a new tradition, and feel included," - Ming Chen