Life Lessons in Gratitude
Approaching this month's topic of gratitude has had me reflecting on a lot of things I have to be grateful for. Friendship is one of those things that seems to transcend age, race, financial circumstances and even some of the most startling differences in personality people can have.
Friendship is one of the things I find myself tremendously grateful for this time of year and I felt that in an uncharacteristically personal way, I'd share a bit about a friend of mine and what that influence has come to mean to me over nearly twenty-five years since we met.
A Conversation with a Friend
I’ve known Tex Tolman since 1999 when he was building premium quality homes in some of the nicest new developments around the Grand Valley. One of the earliest things I learned about him was his love for baseball and especially coaching.
I’m also grateful for the time spent together in many other things we both enjoy: golf, fishing, construction projects, backpack trips and Scouting activities, and have learned that he loves coaching in all these areas just like he does in baseball.
My own experiences and those I have witnessed have shown me a type of servant leadership that is focused on relationships and seeing the potential in others - then helping them tap in and bring that potential out in improved performance. Being a guide like this helps others recognize their potential, their gifts and to ultimately excel in those gifts. Personalized training like his expertise with a “fungo” bat stuck with players long after their time in competition.
In May, a long overdue honor was bestowed upon my friend because others who also value their experiences with him advocated for his recognition. For over 50 years Tex has been directly involved with the national championship tournament for junior college baseball administered by NJCAA known as JUCO. Grand Junction has hosted this event for 65 years and is contracted with the National Junior College Athletic Association to continue hosting the tournament by contract until 2035.
In March 2013 The NJCAA published an article about JUCO’s history titled A” Grand” Place for Baseball, which included the following:
In 1955, NJCAA President Reed K. Swenson (Tex’s Uncle) determined that a study was needed to determine the interest and viability of a national baseball tournament. Swenson formed a special investigative committee and chose his brother-in-law and NJCAA Secretary, Jay Tolman from Mesa Junior College in Grand Junction, to chair the commission. (Part of this study included comparing the regional playoff structure in basketball as a potential model for baseball playoffs.) Tolman’s son, Tex, recalls his childhood being surrounded by the preliminary talks of a junior college baseball championship.
“In 1955, I remember my father started talking about championship baseball,” Tex Tolman said. “(Swenson) and my father used to talk about it all the time on fishing trips.”
In 1957, Tolman presented the results of his study which clearly indicated that the NJCAA membership desired a championship for America’s pastime. Approximately one-half of the NJCAA’s 230 member institutions participated in intercollegiate baseball and a majority of those programs supported the idea of a championship tournament.
Despite the excitement and enthusiasm surrounding the concept, the NJCAA was unable to identify a sponsor or host that could adequately finance and support such an event. At the NJCAA Annual Meeting in March of 1958, the organization’s membership awarded the 1958 tournament to Northeastern Oklahoma A&M College on a one-year trial basis in Miami, OK. (This tournament was poorly attended and had unfavorable weather which led Jay Tolman, D.S, “Dyke” Dykstra, Charles Lumley, Hurst Otto, Dale Hollingsworth - GJ Chamber Director and publicity chair -, Wayne Nelson, Rudy Sussman & Frank Gibbs to petition Grand Junction’s “Town Fathers” to get behind the tournament and bring it here for the foreseeable future. Many others including Redd K. Swenson, Sam Suplizio Sr. and Bus Bergman were heavily involved in garnering community support to place this tournament on solid footing as an annual event.
My own sons got to benefit from coaching by Tex too; from construction projects their fellow Scouters lined up as community service, to outdoorsman skills and learning ice fishing on winter retreats. Every year for decades countless young men and women were guided through dense forest to a spectacular waterfall, across the skyline of the Ragged Mountain range and through trackless wilderness to and from Tomahawk Lake for “high adventure” outings. For decades he also guided Scouters and on some occasions JUCO teams on excursions into the Black Canyon of the Gunnison River in the Spring.
I personally got to spend an afternoon on the golf course with him and we lucked into a three hour window with no one right behind us. The coaching I got and the opportunity to spend quality time with a friend are things I’ll remain grateful for long after I can no longer swing a club.
When I talked with Tex about this story, we spoke of his NJCAA Hall of Fame induction this May and the friendships he has made over more than 50 years coaching players and working with junior college baseball coaches from all over the country.
Tex’s sister, Maggie and Central Florida coach Marty Smith who’s been a friend since 1997, combined efforts to advocate for his induction into the hall of fame and coach Smith's team was already here, in Grand Junction for the tournament. By the way, his team also won the tournament this year. Mitch Thompson from McLennan Junior College in Texas also wrote to the selection committee advocating for Tex to be inducted this year. Among memories that hold deep meaning for Tex is the visit he received from coach Thompson during a particularly difficult hospital stay that coincided with the 2014 JUCO tournament. Tex missed the tournament that year and though Coach Thompson didn't know Tex personally before that visit, he made the time to visit a well-known member of the JUCO family who was absent that year from tournament activities. They've been good friends ever since. Cowley County Kansas coach Dave Burrows (1997 and 1998 tournament Champions) also joined the petitioners writing to the committee.
When asked what means the most to him about this experience, Tex told me that what means the most to him isn’t necessarily the recognition, the five-plus decades of being directly involved with the tournament or the countless other opportunities to provide coaching in a variety of activities he enjoys. “It’s the people, their examples of gratitude and commitment to working together and the lives that exemplify ‘practicing gratitude’”.
As we move into the Holiday Season we talked about the gratitude, both of us feel surrounding the interests we have in common. We want to encourage those who read this to “practice gratitude”, to search out your individual talents and gifts in life and seek out ways to use those gifts to help uplift others as we move toward a bright new year. Tex also wants to express a deep and heartfelt appreciation for his wife Janine and for all of her support over many decades of community involvement.
Friendship is one of the things I find myself tremendously grateful for this time of year and I felt that in an uncharacteristically personal way, I'd share a bit about a friend of mine and what that influence has come to mean to me over nearly twenty-five years since we met.