January in Michigan doesn’t care about your resolutions. So by the time the sparkle of the holidays fades, and the sky turns its usual shade of gray, the “new year energy” we swore we’d ride all month feels more like a flickering pilot light. The gyms are buzzing, the apps are tracking, but by the end of the month, most of us feel our resolve dissolving like breath in cold air.
For our January Wellness issue, we turned to three local guides: a martial arts master, a psychologist, and a massage and nature therapist.
The question: how do you build well-being that lasts longer than a resolution?
Focus on the ‘what,’ not the ‘how’
“We’ll say out loud what we want to do and we’re really excited about it,” Dean Romanelli says. “The problem is things get in the way.”
Dean, owner and master instructor of Romanelli’s International Martial Arts, has taught thousands of kids and families how discipline becomes confidence in motion. For him, well-being starts with getting started—over and over.
In his dojo, January is “black belt goal-setting season.” Kids and families write their goals, create simple vision sheets, and put their own picture on the page. “They think they’re doing it for us,” Dean laughs. “But they’re doing it for themselves, so they can see that reminder every day.”
His biggest reframe: stop waiting to have all the answers.
“For years, I didn’t implement changes because I didn’t have everything planned,” he admits. “A mentor coached me to just take the first step. The ‘what’ is way more important than the ‘how.’”
A first step might be flossing before bed, or doing ten minutes of your half-hour workout. “The action of just getting started is more important than completing the task,” Dean says. Momentum builds discipline.
Dean’s tips for the year ahead:
- Do something, even if it’s less than planned. Ten minutes beats zero.
- Use routine as your ally. “Take care of the days,” he says, “and the years will take care of themselves.”
- Surround yourself with people who lift you up. Parents can be that for their kids by asking more and telling less. “If parents asked more questions,” he says, “the whole world would change.”
Dean’s final reminder: keep the promises you make to yourself. “Even if no one else knows you skipped the task at hand, you know,” Dean notes. “And that chips away at you fast.”
Make room for real feelings
Dr. Karen Groth is the founder of ASK Psychological Services in Mount Clemens, where her all-women team helps clients navigate stress, relationships, and the tender realities of everyday life.
“The truth I wish everyone understood,” she says, “is that there’s no such thing as perfect. We’re not meant to live in permanent happiness. We’re designed to experience the full gamut of emotions. When we start to feel the more negative ones, our alarm system goes off and we think something’s wrong with us, when it might just be a completely normal reaction.”
That’s especially true in January in Michigan. “It’s our coldest and grayest month of the year,” she notes. Coming off the stress of the holidays, many people make mental health their resolution, then feel they’ve failed when they’re not “better” in three weeks. But Dr. Karen says: “Mental health is an ongoing process. We’re always on a continuum.”
Her invitation for the new year: choose two or three things you’d like to see shift: lower stress, better coping, healthier relationships. Then be realistic about your timeline.
“It took us years, sometimes decades, to develop our patterns,” she explains. “It’s going to take time to un-develop them.”
Dr. Karen’s simple, science-backed tools:
- Name what you want to work on. Two clear intentions beat a vague “I should feel better.”
- Lean into social support. “Talking is huge,” she says. “Lots of times people don’t want problem-solving; they just want you to listen.” Dr. Karen says the key is being honest. “People think sharing makes them a burden,” she explains, “but being real and open is one of the strongest protectors of our mental health.”
- Return to the basics. “I really wish people would learn to get along again,” she says. “We don’t have to agree or like everybody. We just need to remember the messages we learned in kindergarten: everyone has different experiences, and everyone brings something valuable to the table.”
Her last reminder: “You don’t need a mental health diagnosis to see a therapist. A lot of people who show up don’t have one. They just have life.”
Let your nervous system exhale
Dean helped us get in motion; Dr. Karen helped us understand. Susan Laurent, owner of Natural Healing Therapeutic Massage, PLLC, helps us calm. Susan is a licensed and board-certified massage therapist, and a certified forest therapy guide; she helps clients regulate their nervous systems through touch, nature, and intentional rest.
“Calm your body, and your mind naturally follows,” she says. “Massage doesn’t just loosen tight muscles; it shifts your whole system out of stress mode. As the body softens, breathing slows, the heart rate settles, and thoughts quiet.”
Susan also guides people in the restorative gifts of being outdoors. “You don’t need to meditate, hike, or know anything about trees,” she explains. “Just walking slowly, noticing the sky, or sitting beside a tree lowers stress and boosts your immune system.”
This past year, her own nervous system reset came from a different kind of release: Susan deleted all her social media.
“Instagram, Facebook, all of it,” she says. “I didn’t realize how overstimulated my brain was until it wasn’t. Removing social media gave me back my attention, my peace, and my ability to actually feel present in my own life.”
If you don’t want to go that far, try what Susan calls “unplugged moments”:
- Thirty minutes with no screens
- Sitting outside with tea
- A massage where your phone stays in the car
“Most people think wellness means adding more: more gym time, more habits, more routines,” Susan says. “Very often, the biggest shift happens when you actually slow down, breathe better, sleep deeper—let your body reset, instead of constantly pushing it. Unplugging is recovery.” Like car maintenance, your body deserves care before it breaks down.
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As the new year settles over Mount Clemens, it’s important to remember that a beginning doesn’t have to be dramatic. You just have to begin: one small action, one honest conversation, one moment where your body remembers how to exhale. Change may feel miles away… but it always starts in inches.