Jan Moreland is a Dripping Springs resident and leading real estate agent with Moreland Properties. She and her daughter, Ellie Coburn, have chosen to share their story of addiction and recovery.
Ellie Coburn was a typical high school kid—a good student and “a fun person everyone loved to be with,” according to her mother, Jan Moreland. Like many teenagers, she and her friends began experimenting with marijuana, and Coburn gradually increased her usage. But in her mind, “it was harmless,” she says. “We weren’t ‘the druggies.’”
When she headed to college, Coburn continued using marijuana, and when the coronavirus pandemic hit and COVID restrictions left her isolated and depressed, her drug use became extreme. “I started to smoke so much weed,” she remembers. “I was waking up and the first thing I would do was get high, and then the last thing I would do before bed was get really high.”
As her drug use escalated, “I could not do anything without being high or under the influence; I lost all motivation,” Coburn says. “People say you can’t get addicted to weed, but that is so not the case. I could not function without it.”
Coburn was awake all night, sleeping all day, and failing her classes. As her mother observed, “She was a completely non-functioning human.” She was also making life miserable for the rest of her family. Her mom shares, “Ellie was so unpleasant to be with, we didn’t even want to be in the same room as her.”
Ellie agrees, admitting that during this time she lied, stole money from her parents, had emotional outbursts, disrespected her family, and created a volatile environment. “When I was in active addiction, I was horrible,” she shares. “When you’re hurting and in a really low place, it’s hard to see outside of yourself … because all you can think about is your own misery.”
Knowing that her daughter had hit rock bottom, Moreland discovered the Sage Recovery & Wellness treatment center. “It was a relief for me when my mother told me that I was going to a place to get help,” Coburn says.
In contrast, Moreland was anxious and scared: “I prayed I was doing the right thing. They took her, and I had to drive off,” she remembers.
As she began the 35 days of her in-patient rehabilitation, Coburn felt alone and misunderstood, but she found consolation through talking, relating, and connecting in group therapy sessions. She realized, “Other people have this problem too. I’m not alone. I’m not broken. I’m not weak because of this.”
Through intensive treatment that went beyond detox and emphasized behavior therapy, teaching her to regulate her emotions, Coburn made great strides at Sage. “Ellie was ready for a change, and I think that’s why rehab worked so well for her,” Moreland explains. “She was ready to do the hard work.”
When Moreland visited a few weeks later, she saw the change in her daughter. “I’ll never forget … she was standing on the front porch and she had a huge smile on her face, and she was glad to see me. That was a big deal.” In this pivotal moment, Moreland says, “I knew things would get better.”
Things certainly were better, but the transition from rehab is tenuous. When Coburn made the fragile shift back into the real world, she stopped eating altogether and developed anorexia, trading one addiction for another.
As Coburn struggled with the eating disorder, Moreland had to apply tough love. “I didn’t mince words,” remembers Moreland. “I said, ‘We are not going to do this; I’m not going to sit here and watch you kill yourself. We’re going to get you help.’”
As she sought care, Coburn faced a choice once again. “There’s nothing more painful, that I’ve been through, than the anorexia—even in my darkest days of active addiction. I decided to choose recovery,” she says, and through a slow, three-month outpatient treatment program, Coburn reclaimed her health.
On this path to healing, family—and their unwavering love and support—has been the cornerstone for both women. They are also thankful for loyal friends. “The process of getting sober really shows you who loves you,” Coburn says.
Seeking to help other parents who may find themselves in a similar situation, Moreland shares, “I would tell parents not to be like me and have your head in the sand,” she says. “I didn’t want to admit that my kid was doing what she was doing.”
Moreland adds that substance abuse and rehabilitation are often attached to stigma. “Don’t be ashamed of this,” she states. “It’s a problem that so many families have, and they don’t even know it. Shout it from the rooftops that you need help because you’re not alone.”
Coburn agrees. “It’s okay not to be okay,” she says. “Life is hard. Releasing the shame about getting help is so important.”
Moreland tells parents to pay attention, be patient, and don’t give up on your child, even when their behavior is unthinkable. Now that she’s sober, Coburn understands her mother’s tough-love decisions. “The opposite of love is not hate; the opposite of love is indifference,” she explains.
With treatment, perseverance, and a faithful support system, Coburn is on a brighter path. Now three years sober, she is back in school, working full time, living on her own, and paying her own way. “My entire life has changed since getting sober,” she says. “Sometimes the things that are hardest are the things that are best for you. There’s freedom in discipline—that has been the biggest thing that I love about my life since being sober.”
She also loves the outdoors, reading, and getting to know strangers. Looking forward to traveling and pursuing a master’s degree, she says, “I’m healthy, and I’m happy. Every day is different, but it’s all about my perspective. And that’s one thing I can control in a world that will just throw anything at you, so I’m very thankful.”
Moreland is proud of her daughter and excited for all that her future holds. “I’m thankful for this wonderful daughter that God gave me, who truly is going to change the world,” she says.
As she reflects on her journey, Coburn remarks, “These past three years have been the most beautiful and the hardest years of my life.”
“What I’m most thankful for is the opportunity to live life. I definitely pushed my soul to the absolute maximum limits,” she continues. “I’m just so thankful for love, and for forgiveness, and the opportunity to experience this beautiful world.”
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