Stephanie O’Hara’s inspiration to write her memoir came after she experienced her first of seven miscarriages. She realized that there were lots of books for coping with many of life’s challenges, but a lack of information for couples struggling with infertility issues.
“I knew in my heart I was being called to write my story, share my experience and create support for the millions of women suffering from the emotional devastation of being diagnosed as infertile,” she explains. “I didn’t want the next person who experienced a miscarriage to feel the helplessness and grief that I did. No one should walk alone during those formidable moments.”
Becoming a mother of three did not come easily for Stephanie. She experienced secondary infertility after the birth of her first son, Aidan. Six years and seven miscarriages later, she recognized that her body needed the assistance of a gestational carrier. Stephanie and her husband, Dirk, ultimately turned to a surrogate named Tiffany to carry their twins.
Stella and Smith were born in September 2015, on what Stephanie jokes was the most appropriate time—Labor Day weekend.
“If you would have told me I would have twins in my 40s, and that someone else would carry them for me, I would have laughed,” she reflects. “I have a particularly unique perspective, having both given birth and watched someone else give birth to my biological children.”
Stephanie’s experiences inspired her memoir, Angel Wings, which was released in August.
“It’s a no-filter recounting of our journey and the feelings I experienced, which included isolation, loneliness, discouragement, failure, shame, sadness and depression. I also share the funny moments and the laughter which helped to dissipate the dark times,” she says. “Too often, women pull away and suffer in silence. It’s time to give them a voice. They are warriors and deserve the family they dream of.”
It took Stephanie four years to write Angel Wings. Although the memoir is about her challenges in building a family, she also says it is a “testament to the strength of female friendships."
“Through my infertility journey, I had many angels that guided my path,” she says. “From a counselor and life coach, to friends, random strangers and even a celebrity, God put certain women in my life to help direct and support me. I am forever grateful to them.”
Stephanie adds that the memoir is not just for those experiencing infertility.
“It is about being hopeful in dark times,” she says. “We can use difficult moments to develop courage and resilience. I also hope that the memoir will help loved ones and friends to better understand, love and support those dealing with infertility.”
Stephanie and Tiffany have since founded Baby Blessings, a support ministry for families dealing with infertility, loss and difficult pregnancies. Their mission is to support women and couples spiritually, financially and practically.
“We believe that anyone that wants to become a parent should be given that opportunity, no matter what their challenges are,” Stephanie adds.
A portion of the proceeds from Angel Wings will support Baby Blessings.
“We hope to provide financial assistance and fertility scholarships for those who have challenges building a family,” she explains. “My prayer is that this book will support, comfort and give hope to those experiencing a miscarriage or an infertility diagnosis.”
Stephanie also is hopeful that sharing her story will help others believe in miracles and remember to always have hope.
“Things may not happen in your time, the exact way you want them to,” she concludes. “But miracles do happen if we trust and listen!” And she feels like her family is living proof.
Angel Wings is available at Barnes & Noble, Walmart, Amazon and Books-A-Million in hardback, paperback and ebook. Visit YourAngelWings.net for more information about Stephanie, and to explore blogs, podcasts, support, articles and more.
You can follow Stephanie on Instagram at @angelwingssteph, on Facebook or on Twitter at @AngelwingsSteph.