Gary Thomas and his wife Jay want women who are on the verge of divorce to know that that the end of your marriage doesn’t mean the end of your life as you know it – it’s the beginning of a new life.
That is what the women who enroll in their Divorce Bootcamp – a 14-week course - learn right away. During the program, Gary, an attorney and mediator who has spent most of his career as a financial advisor and Jay, a social worker, take women through every aspect of the divorce process.
“It’s not about just getting through a divorce; it’s about getting through it in the best possible way and creating a new future for yourself,” said Jay. To that end, she and Gary give Divorce Bootcamp participants a road map - a system for moving forward. “No one’s given them that. We meet so many people who haven’t been given the right information – or the long-term perspective,” Gary said.
Gary and Jay consider themselves coaches. “We turn dreamers into talented mapmakers,” said Jay. Most people want to get through the divorce process as fast as possible said Jay, but that can sometimes lead to wrong choices. “We slow down the process, so your time is used efficiently, so you know where you’re going. We ask women what they want and what is attainable. We look at what’s possible in each situation. If you don’t ask, you don’t get,” Gary said.
Although there are guidelines in divorce cases, he said there is no limitation on what a divorce settlement can be. Divorce is the biggest negotiation people will go through in their lives, Gary said, noting that no one is ever prepared for a negotiation. Ending a marriage is also one of the biggest emotional and financial decisions of a person’s life, said the Thomases.
“If you are stressed, your intelligence goes down," Gary said, “and Jay is an expert at de-stressing people.” They advise women that it is OK to say no if they don’t have the full picture. The idea for Divorce Bootcamp came from Gary’s experience as a financial advisor at his firm, The Wealth Technology Group. He met a lot of women who he said, “got the short end of the stick for a lot of reasons.” He found that it wasn’t only the financial aspect of the divorce that created issues.
Divorce Bootcamp is for women who want to be proactive because, as Jay said, “You can’t be passive in your divorce. Our client is someone who knows that there is something better ahead.”
Jay and Gary say that clients must be willing to work. “We ask you some tough things, but they will help in the end. We want our clients to come from a position of strength. You can put yourself there - it’s a mindset,” said Jay.
At least half of the women who enroll in Divorce Bootcamp are over 60, and because they have been in long-term marriages, many of them have not had a chance to be their own person, Gary said. “We help them see that divorce is not the end; it’s the beginning.”
Each Divorce Bootcamp program is limited to 10 women and sessions are conducted in person and on Zoom. Once a month there is a meeting with local clients in the program. “There is a real benefit to share with others who are going through the same thing. It’s very therapeutic to pass on your success with other women who are just starting the process,” Gary said.
The tagline for Divorce Bootcamp is “Find Your Inner Soldier. Divorce is Tough, But You Can Be Tougher.”
For more information, call 413-739-3511 or email Gary@WealthTechnology.com
The Wealth Technology Group
130 Southampton Rd, Westfield