The Worst Gifts for the Best Moms

There are a few gifts no mother wants, even if she is too polite to tell you.

While there is an endless variety of ways to recognize and honor Mom on Mother’s Day, there are a few gifts no Mother wants, even if she is too polite to tell you. So, on behalf of mothers everywhere, please save yourself and steer clear of the following:

A coupon book for chores you should already do. For children younger than nine years old, a handmade coupon book for washing dishes or making the bed is darling. For children over nine years old, a coupon book will awaken an ire in Mom. She shouldn’t need a promissory note for something she has asked you to do 5,000 times like unload the dishwasher or take out the recycling. Do these things without being asked. The gift is not having to ask.  

A cow-themed pot holder, even if we once mentioned we thought cows were cute. Oooh. This is tricky. Because we might make a comment-Wow, cows are so adorable! However, this is NOT an invitation to gift us a cow sweatshirt, cow earrings, cow pillows, cow art, cow kitchen accessories over the next decade. It’s just a comment. We don’t need a thematic collection. We don’t have room. We are still storing all your participation trophies.

A project. If it says DIY on the box, do yourself (and us) a favor and put it back on the shelf. We can’t tolerate a project that is foisted upon us. Parenting is our lifelong project and please don’t make us regret it.

Under-eye creams that say "anti-aging" on the packaging. We didn’t even have these bags under our eyes until you came onto the scene. We have had more sleepless nights than we can count waiting up for you. No need to point it out. We know we look weathered. You were the storm.

Breakfast in bed at 7:00 A.M. Please, let us sleep. Please. We will be so grateful and much happier if we wake up on our own schedule. Breakfast in bed at 10:00 A.M. would be delightful. Don’t forget the mimosas. Mimosas will soften the blow for when you hand us the coupon book you have made.

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