If you told me as a young girl that I would not be married or have a few kids by 45, I would never have believed you. I come from a generation and time where ‘success’ seemed defined by a society-approved checklist: go to college, climb the corporate ladder, achieve the title and paycheck, get married, have kids, and land your dream home in the right zip code by age 35. And while this may sound ideal for some, not achieving it all within the expected timeframe often left society quick to label you as having 'failed at life'—or worse, as if something was inherently wrong with you.
Well, great news: you are not behind, you most certainly have not failed, and there's nothing wrong with you.
You, my friends, are right on time and exactly where you need to be. Living your authentic truth... a truth that should be celebrated.
What if the lesson in the journey for many of us is less comparison to other people's timelines and more surrendering and trusting in knowing we’re all here for different experiences? For our destiny. That the Universe, God, Source, or whatever you believe in has a plan for you better than you have imagined for yourself. Just because it’s taking a little longer for you and your person to align with divine timing doesn’t mean it won’t happen.
I felt compelled to share this message especially because it's Valentine's month. It's my intention for all those reading this who are single, at any age, to feel less alone and validated in their feelings and life experiences. To be reminded that our worth and our life identity is not our relationship status: single, married, partnered, widowed, divorced - you are worthy exactly as you are!
A decade ago, a profound upheaval in my personal life sparked a transformative journey of deep spiritual healing and self-discovery. It was one I didn’t know I needed and equally could not be more grateful for. I moved away from the circus of my once desired, day-to-day life and constant hustle in Los Angeles; my identity and career, and started a new life here in Scottsdale.
Life here was immediately softer and more aligned. Starting fresh at 35—moving to a new city alone while building a small business—was surely daunting, but it was also an incredibly courageous leap. It was lonely at times and easy to let the pressures of timelines, society, friends, family, the checklist, and let’s face it, my own wants and desires take over, too. With years flying by filled with engagement announcements, wedding photos, and gender reveal posts on social media—along with years wasted for many not dating during a global pandemic—it was hard not to feel discouraged. I mean how could you not, right?
Whether you choose to stay single, get married, have kids or not have kids, partner or no partner, this is what I've learned: we are all worthy of love. And even if you don't see yourself at this moment in time, I see you and your journey matters.
As I've gotten older, I think one of the most attractive qualities in someone is their ability to have faith and enjoy their life while remaining detached from the outcomes of when and how things will happen. True freedom!
When I say you're right on time, it's because I truly believe that your destiny will never pass you by. Beshert.
So keep doing you. Do what fuels your soul; there is no right or wrong, only what's right for you.
Nicole Myden is a Scottsdale-based publicist and author of the Amazon Bestselling Book, "You Are Worthy of Publicity." Her book serves as a reminder to small business owners that they are worthy of sharing their stories with the world. nicolemyden.com