The holidays are a time for connection, laughter, and creating memories with the people we love most. Yet as loved ones age, it can take extra thought and care to make sure everyone feels included and comfortable. To help families navigate this season with warmth and intention, we turned to Chelsea Moreno, Chief Operating Officer at Morningside Ministries, which operates a retirement community at Menger Springs. She shares how thoughtful planning, meaningful activities, and small gestures can make a big impact. After all, the heart of the holidays is about togetherness for every generation.
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(Responses edited for length and clarity.)
The holidays are a time when families often spend time together. However, when a loved one is aging or requires individualized attention, it can sometimes be challenging to know how to help. Where should families start?
Moreno: Start with the heart, then look at the calendar. Before planning who’s bringing the stuffing or how many chairs you’ll need, pause to connect with your aging loved one. Ask what part of the season really matters to them. Maybe it’s a favorite dish, a long-loved tradition, or simply quiet time with family. And, yes, it may be fuzzy slippers and an old Christmas movie marathon.
This is the season of grace, not guilt. If your loved one needs care or can’t do everything they used to, that’s perfectly okay. Focus on making memories, not on making things “perfect.” Whether they’re joining you at home or you’re visiting them in their community, your presence will always mean more than your Pinterest skills.
When planning events, what should we keep in mind to ensure all our family members feel included?
M: Think of your holiday gathering like a potluck—everyone brings something special, and everyone leaves feeling full. Make sure the space is comfy and accessible: chairs with good support, bathrooms nearby, and enough room for anyone using a walker or wheelchair. Keep dietary needs in mind, because someone’s always gluten-free, someone’s watching their salt, and someone under five is living on crackers.
Additionally, consider avoiding the “mall in December” volume level. Create a few quieter corners where people can chat or take a breather. Inclusion isn’t just about logistics; it’s about making sure everyone feels like they belong, exactly as they are.
The holidays can be special opportunities for older family members to interact with the youngest generation. How can we encourage that at our gatherings?
M: Kids have endless questions. Grandparents have endless stories. Magic happens when those worlds meet. Have older loved ones read a holiday story, help decorate cookies, or play “Ask Grandma Anything.” Trust me, “Did you have Wi-Fi as a kid?” is always a hit.
Faith reminds us that wisdom is meant to be shared, and there’s something deeply beautiful about watching generations laugh, talk, pray, and just be together.
Do you have ideas for activities that families of any size can incorporate into their holiday events?
M: Absolutely, and it’s not just bingo (though we’ll never turn down a good bingo game). Try a multi-generational trivia night with questions from different decades. Start a gratitude jar or tree where everyone adds something they’re thankful for. Pull out old photo albums or home videos. You’ll be amazed at how quickly the stories—and laughter—start flowing.
What do you think are some of the most important things to keep in mind when hosting senior family members this season?
M: Make sure the space feels welcoming: warm enough, well-lit, and calm. Don’t overload the schedule. If you’re exhausted after two holiday parties, imagine how Grandma feels! And remember, this season can stir up big emotions, especially after loss or change. Make space for those feelings.
The holidays aren’t about perfection; they’re about presence. Whether you’re gathered around the same table or connecting from afar, the heart of the season is showing up for one another.