Sometimes it’s not all about winning, explains Duke Baxter, owner of Zoned, a Bridgewater baseball and softball developmental training facility.
Don’t get him wrong. Baxter loves a success story and hosts Signing Days for all of the academy’s athletes about to play in college. And the company has many each year, especially after encouraging student leaders with $224,000 in scholarships since 2007.
And he’s no slouch either. Baxter's professional baseball career spanned three years, commencing with a Wisconsin team that has since disbanded, followed by a stint with the Somerset Patriots. Additionally, he boasts two patents related to baseball and softball training aids. Furthermore, he co-authored the book "Taking on the Title of COACH" to assist parents taking on coaching roles and initiated the online academy, Dominate the Diamond, in 2017 to provide them with further support.
Despite all his accomplishments, Baxter’s message remains simple: more play, less pressure.
Children have been grappling with increasing anxiety and depression for decades now and evidence suggests the pandemic was a force multiplier. “As soon as they struggle, some just want to quit,” Baxter says. “They’re just so quick to shut it down now.” So he tells them: “Hey, who cares? You just struck out, but that’s part of the game.”
“We’re not going to be perfect,” he says. “We’re going to make a lot of bad swings. But we’re gonna take a lot of good swings, too.’“
He encourages kids—and coaches—to focus on the wins. “If you get three hits with ten at-bats, you make it to the Hall of Fame. So, are you focused on the seven outs you made—a negative outlook—or the three times you got hits—a positive outlook?”
Of course, teaching and training often involve suggestions to fine-tune skills. But Baxter likes to stop players from over-indexing on the stumbles. “Disrupt the negative mindset and move on,” he says. “What did you learn from those strikeouts? Okay, so that’s done and now we have a clean slate. Let’s go!”
Baxter practices what he preaches as a parent, too, avoiding the all-too-common “dreadful car ride home” post-mortems. When he wears his baseball cap, he’s available to analyze games where he coached his four kids. And if they want to get into it, they wear their hats, too. Otherwise, he says, “I only talk as a dad. This gives the player the right to direct and control the setting, not the parent.”
Millions have watched his videos on social media and have followed suit. “People say how it changed their lives and relationships with their kids,” he says. “They hadn’t realized what they were doing and how harmful it was to their relationships.”
This kind, caring approach permeates Zoned. Even its star athletes—like a student who just signed at the University of Massachusetts—say they would tell their younger selves to relax and enjoy the game more. Take the pressure off. Don’t worry about what everybody else is doing. Don’t worry about what college you’ll be at. Just play with your friends and enjoy it because it all goes by so fast.
Yoga and mindfulness meditation have helped Baxter find—and share—this grace and gratitude after a hard-driven youth. “I still do my best and I’m very competitive, but I used to hate to lose and now I love losing! It’s like if you were playing cornhole: Would you rather be the person who would crush everyone or would you rather play against guys who elevate you to be even better? I love being the underdog. What am I going to learn and do and how am I going to raise myself to that next level? Just enjoy the ride!”
Part of that, for Baxter, involves celebrating the wins more. “I used to just hit a goal and move onto the next thing and never really even be happy with what I did, because I could have done better,” he says. “Self-talk is important. I’m realizing that as I get older. These kids should talk to themselves as if they were giving their best friend advice.”
Baxter encourages kids to ease up and show themselves the kindness they give others. And he’s also a fan of the author and motivational speaker Mel Robbins, who recommends high-fiving yourself in the mirror every morning.
“Give yourself permission to go and be great,” Baxter says.
Learn more about Zoned at ZonedInc.com.
Would you rather be the person who would crush everyone or would you rather play against guys who elevate you to be even better? I love being the underdog. What am I going to learn and do and how am I going to raise myself to that next level? Just enjoy the ride!