Although I’m 61, I still don’t feel grown up. Yet every time I work closely with Garrison Brothers’ All-Around Cowboy Russell Hartmann, I find myself saying, “If I ever grow up, I want to be like that man.”
Russell is 6’8”, built like a linebacker and easily ten years my senior. If he’s ever been tired, felt pain or sadness, I’ve never seen anything on his weathered handsome face but a warm amused grin. Previously, he retired from a multi-decade career with the Texas Department of Transportation. He has a nice home, a beautiful ranch and a wonderful family.
He doesn’t need to work at Garrison Brothers. He does so because we share the same values and work ethics. His endearing attributes are his cowboy mannerisms. When he meets a woman, whether for the first time or the 100th, he instantly bows and tips his hat with his thumb and forefinger while lighting up the lady with a sweet fatherly grin. That smile is infectious. The South is filled with chivalrous men like Russell.
I believe rodeo season exemplifies what it means to be a southern gentleman in Texas. Felt hats adorn most heads. Kids wear them too. I cherish the custom. Felt hats are hot, and most men are eager to switch to straw when the rodeo concludes.
As I reflect on rodeos past, my favorite part is when the rodeo announcer says, “Please rise for prayer and the national anthem.” In one fluid swoosh, all the hats come down from the men’s heads and are placed with one hand on their chests over their hearts. Southern men still love their country and talk to God despite what we hear on the network news. I shed a prideful tear each time I witness it.
I think there are small actions men take that reflect what it means to be a gentleman. Southern moms and dads, gently but willfully, pass along these customs. When approaching a table at a restaurant, southern gentlemen know to give their ladies the best table and best view of the room. Women often choose the seat that faces the crowd or front door. I suspect this is so they can warn their date if someone they know is approaching.
Law enforcement officers get a pass on this one; they’re trained to face the door to best protect the diners and staff from potential incoming danger.
One custom I fear fading is when a gentleman lets the lady lead them out after dinner, or he extends an elbow for her to hold so they can exit together while smiling at the guests. I’ve always felt this was important. It demonstrates how connected the couple is socially. If the woman rejects the man’s arm, she may have other things on her mind than him. When I see a man rushing to the exit leaving his date in his dust, they may have argued or the man is self-absorbed.
Phones have exacerbated the situation. Some men and women pick up their phone to review messages as they leave instead of staying focused on each other.
I may be over-thinking these examples. Call me nostalgic or old-fashioned if you wish - I like the sound of that. But I believe parents have opportunities to occasionally reinforce Southern traditions. Your kids may reject that, but when they are grownups - like hopefully I’ll be one day - they might regret that they didn’t pay more attention.
Just wait, gallantry is on the comeback trail.
Dan Garrison is founder and owner of Garrison Brothers Distillery, located at 1827 Hye-Albert Rd. in Hye, Texas.
I think there are small actions men take that reflect what it means to be a gentleman. Southern moms and dads, gently but willfully, pass along these customs.