Hosting friends and family during the holiday season can bring us so much joy. And also… stress. Having the privilege of sharing meals and laughter with loved ones takes thought and preparation as well as time that we don’t always have.
Though if we look back on our most memorable holiday moments, it wasn’t the flawless decor or over-the-top meals that stand out. It’s the still moments between the hustle and bustle, the imperfect moments where we fully embraced the joy and reflection that come hand-in-hand with the holiday season.
Whether you are hosting Christmas brunch, Chanukah celebrations, or throwing your annual New Year’s Eve party, here are some simple hosting tips for creating a meaningful holiday without losing sight of why you choose to host friends and family in the first place.
1) Set fair and reasonable expectations for yourself. Acknowledge that things may not be perfect, and that’s okay. Identify the ways you want to go all-out with your efforts and where you are open to compromise. There are a lot of creative ways to make ordinary things feel magical. For example, if you have big tablescape dreams and a kitchen twine budget, try skipping the new table runner for a long piece of decorative butcher paper from a local gift shop. It’s amazing how a combination of unexpected materials and textures can effortlessly elevate the feeling of a space.
2) Plan your menu, cleaning, and decor at least a few weeks in advance. It’s amazing what having a plan can do to decrease stress and maximize your enjoyment of the hosting process. Make a list of tasks that can be checked off in the weeks leading up to your event. Planning ahead can help you avoid last-minute decisions, expenses, and unnecessary stress. Also, be prepared to pivot. The best laid plans often change.
3) Share the work. Where possible, delegate to friends and family or hire a contractor for work you don’t enjoy. Whether it’s the cleaning, shopping, or preparing food and beverages, many hands make the work light. Guests will often ask, “How can I help?!” and would delight in the opportunity to contribute to the experience. Bringing in a trusted vendor or two is a great way to support local business. Win, win!
4) Build a holiday schedule that leaves room for quiet moments. Carve out time for yourself and keep your movement and nutrition routine intact as much as possible this season. It sounds like a simple thing, but taking a solo walk the morning of a big holiday or event can shift stress into momentum in no time at all! Remember to be available to yourself first and foremost. Host yourself.
5) Decide on one over-the-top dish, and keep everything else simple. This also applies to decor or even gift-giving. Whether you’re planning an elaborate six-course dinner or a simple appetizer spread, it’s okay to create one “star-of-the-show” dish and to let everything else remain unfussy. Maybe you have a signature dish or dessert that takes a lot of hands-on effort and it’s an absolute must for your holiday table. Great! Plan on preparing complimentary sides that take little prep and energy to free yourself up for your signature dish.
6) Focus on connection. Most of us who love to host do so because we value bringing people together and creating life-long memories. Try to keep connection at the forefront of your mind and heart when you find yourself getting caught up in the details. The people are the purpose, and no one will remember which cloth napkins you chose. They will remember whether you were able to be fully present and who they had time to connect with. Our guests want to be seen and cared for, not simply impressed by the glitter and glam.
7) Keep traditions you love, scrap the rest. If there’s a tradition that is no longer serving your family, this is a reminder that it is okay and perfectly healthy to stop doing them. The wonderful thing about this change, while it can be challenging, is the space it will make for new traditions that make sense for you and your family right where you’re at. As life evolves and our needs as people and family units change, so should our rituals.
8) And lastly, Practice Gratitude: It may sound trite, but take time each day to reflect on what you’re grateful for. This can help shift your mindset from stress to appreciation. A five minute journaling session with your morning coffee might be a quick way to prioritize gratitude before jumping into your infinite task list.
The holiday season is upon us and is often the busiest time of the year. With a few adjustments and a mindful approach to hosting, we can all fully enjoy the season.
The people are the purpose, and no one will remember which cloth napkins you chose.
It’s the still moments between the hustle and bustle, the imperfect moments where we fully embraced the joy and reflection that come hand-in-hand with the holiday season.