They say it takes a village.
If you’re a mother reading this, I want you to think about your family’s daily routine. Consider when your child was a newborn, surviving on formula, living in diapers, and building their immune system one germ at a time.
Think about your baby shower when friends and loved ones celebrated your growing family by gifting you with a car seat, stroller, baby monitors, and clothes. Think about when your partner switched shifts during sleepless nights and shared the financial responsibilities of diapers, daycare, and doctor's visits. Do you have siblings, parents, or in-laws? Can you remember a time when they’d babysit so you could have a date night or an afternoon to recharge your mom batteries? On days when you were sick, did they back you up so you weren’t struggling to care for your infant while fighting a fever?
Mothering is organized chaos; it’s beautiful mayhem. With every new phase of development, you might have wondered, “What did I get myself into?” Yet, even on your lowest and most under-appreciated days, you glow at being called “Mom”.
No family is ‘normal,’ and we all have relative obstacles to overcome. But the beauty of navigating life with a loving village is that you have someone to call, someone to fall back on, when you need help. For many of the mothers at Havenwood–a transitional home for single mothers coming out of crisis–there was no support system; no village.
Take it from mom, Heather, a resident at Havenwood and single mother of two.
“If you don't have someone you can go to, if you don't have family that can help you, if you don't have support, so many moms end up in terrible situations,” she shared.
Heather lost her home and business, and became a single mom when her son's dad went to prison. A year later, Heather’s father also went to prison, and her mom lost the family house. Grappling with crippling anxiety and struggling to find trustworthy care for children with behavioral struggles, Heather recalled desperate years without a true home.
“There were about five years of just living in a hotel and trying to get on my feet,” she said. “My kids' behavior was crazy because of the trauma they had been through, which made it difficult for me to work. I didn’t trust anyone to watch my son because he was so wild. It was just a vicious cycle.”
The final setback that led to Heather applying to Havenwood’s two-year transitional housing program was getting kicked out of her mom’s apartment. “I was stuck for a long time and ended up moving in with my mom,” she said. “That went south because my kids’ behavior had been crazy. They gave me a week to get out, and I was on my knees praying, “God, you gotta work this out. I have to figure something out, or we're gonna be on the streets.”
Heather called Havenwood, and they invited her to interview for their two-year program.
Located near Bentonville's Airship Pumphouse, in a former church building, Havenwood currently accommodates 14 families at a time with studio and one-bedroom apartments. The program has been around for more than 30 years, but it experienced major setbacks during the COVID pandemic, nearly closing its doors for good.
In June of 2023, the organization approached Jim Evans for help. Evans, who brings nearly 20 years of non-profit experience, felt convicted to take over the Executive Director position at Havenwood as a matter of the heart.
“There were families that needed help,” he said. “I had to figure out: Am I going to be the guy who closes this down in a responsible manner, or am I going to be the one to turn it around?”
By December of that year, Evans and Program Director Tara Burghart had determined they wouldn’t have to close Havenwood’s doors. In the years that followed, Evans and his team were able to dig the program out of financial deficit and rehab its relationships with long-standing donors. For their team, the next step to expanding and improving Havenwood’s quality of care looks like owning their building. Ideally, a property donation would allow Havenwood to reinvest all funds into programming and direct support for families.
“These moms, they work so incredibly hard,” Evans said. “We’re trying to create sustainable change that she can do on her own. We’re not an emergency shelter that needs clothing and pantry donations; we’re teaching mom how to budget for that.”
Havenwood seeks to give its families a renewed sense of dignity; a space they can take pride in while they get back on their feet. In addition to things like counseling, employment, debt management, and legal aid, the non-profit sets each family up with a safe and furnished home with affordable rent under $600/month.
“We fully furnish each apartment with brand new furniture,” explains Mary Kate Provost, Director of Marketing & Community Engagement. “No donations, no hand-me-downs. Through sponsorships and donations, we provide furniture that will last, and the family takes it with them when they graduate.”
“You’ll see plaques on some of the apartments,” Evans added. “A company can sponsor a room; $8,000 for a family of two and $12,000 for a family of three. This helps furnish the apartment and goes to support that family throughout the year with whatever emergency services they might need.”
Heather explained how she felt when she toured Havenwood for the first time.
“I walked into the apartment when they were showing it, and I was just crying, thinking, ‘This is it. This is where I'm gonna start getting my life together.’”
It’s not always a rock bottom situation these moms need help out of. For some, like Heather, it’s juggling reliable childcare with stable employment. For others, it’s supporting their family on a single income while struggling to overcome debt and establish the credit needed to get a home.
“Some mothers have a job and transportation, but they have financial hurdles they struggle to overcome on their own,” explains Provost. “We’ve partnered with ARVEST to offer a grant for our moms. It’s a savings plan; as long as they consistently save each month–even if it’s just five dollars–the grant will match it when they graduate. This is a huge help for things like security deposits and first month’s rent.”
“Thanks to these amazing people, I feel like I've grown,” Heather said. ”I'm thankful for the rules. I'm thankful for the stability and the peace that I have now. If anybody asked me years ago, ‘What do you want the most?’ I’d say peace, because I didn't have it, not even a little bit. There was pure chaos in my life. And the one thing that I can say that I'm most thankful for is the peace that I have now.”
In November, Heather will join the 85% of moms who go on to graduate from Havenwood with stable jobs and housing. She will be a part of a network of alumni who continue to support each other and often return to encourage new moms in the program.
When asked how she felt about the next phase, Heather said, “Not being able to support my kids is literally my biggest fear. Now, I'm not afraid to move forward because I have support.”
Havenwood
www.nwahavenwood.org
808 N. Main Street Bentonville
Help: It costs approximately $90 per family, per day to provide the safety, stability, education, and community they need to rebuild their lives. Donate at www.nwahavenwood.org/donate or contact info@nwahavenwood.org to learn about adopting a room and supporting a family for the year.