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 Nehemiah (hearing impairment, intellectual disability) and Nicholas

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Kindness, Connection, Inclusiveness and Compassion

Fostering Friendship: Inside Arizona's "Best Buddies" Program for Kids with Special Needs

First grader Minna Van Arsdale has Rett Syndrome, a neurological disorder caused by a random gene mutation.

“She has two letters flip-flopped in her coding. Minna is nonverbal, walks with assistance, has no useful hand function, experiences abnormal epileptic activity and seizures, breathing abnormalities, feeding and swallowing issues, gastrointestinal issues, and more. She communicates through an eye gaze adaptive communication device and gestures,” says Caroline Van Arsdale, Minna’s mom.

Caroline Van Arsdale (yes, related to the famed Van Arsdale twins) says having a child with disabilities is “heart-wrenchingly amazing and debilitating at the same time.” Good days are awesome, and bad days are awful.

While she has an Arcadia address, Caroline sends Minna to Scottsdale’s Cochise Elementary School, given their solid “differently-abled specials” program.

“Minna is content and always smiles. She’s patient and kind. She loves partaking in Cochise’s ‘Best Buddies’ program – gaining attention from peers that she normally doesn’t get,” says Caroline.

Cochise is one of a handful Arizona elementary schools with a Best Buddies program. The goal: integrating their special needs students with their typical peers to create new friendships and foster understanding, compassion and inclusiveness.

“Doctors stress the importance of Minna spending time with other kids to further her development. It is good for her both neurologically and developmentally. She enjoys being with peers even if she can't always interact. The happiness she feels is so immense and has a lasting effect on every part of her day. Every single ability thrives when she's with peers, including her communication, her breathing, and her movements.”

Best Buddies is the largest organization dedicated to ending the social, physical and economic isolation of the 200 million people worldwide with intellectual and developmental disabilities. It is endorsed by numerous celebrities like Tom Brady and Cindy Crawford.

“Teachers nominate students that are good role models to partake in the program. We do multiple activities throughout the year,” says Shannon Blair, Cochise’s School Psychologist.

Shannon Blair heads the Best Buddies program at Cochise. She says the kids do “get to know you” projects, scavenger hunts, game days, kickball, and pizza and ice cream parties.

“All the participants love the program and look forward to the activities. Our special needs students benefit by having more friends; they always say ‘hi’ or give hugs to each other when passing on campus,” says Shannon.

While the students with disabilities savor their newfound friendships, their hand-selected “buddies” also benefit tremendously, equal if not more than their special friends.

“When you see the special kids and know you have your good health and everything, it’s hard seeing kids who aren't as healthy. I feel like I can make them happier. I have a lot of patience, so I hope that helps,” says Cochise 5th grader Dylan Moses, designated buddy.

Buddies like Dylan have a lot to learn from their special pals especially when it comes to acceptance. At Cochise, there’s a lot of students with disabilities ranging autism, hearing impairment, speech impairment, orthopedic impairment, learning delays, and more.

“It makes me feel good knowing a teacher suggested I become a buddy. It shows me I'm a good person- someone nice and responsible,” says Reese Rinzler, Cochise 5th grader.

As big buddy Reese Rinzler gets to know Minna (pictured), Minna’s mom wants to emphasize the importance of people taking interest in her daughter’s condition.

“I want both kids and their parents to know what it means to Minna and to us as a family, but more importantly, I want others to understand that the slightest bit of positive attention is always welcome and encouraged. I think people get caught up on the ‘right’ thing to say or ask, but for us, it's just nice to know people care. Kids and parents don't have to know the right way to interact with Minna… it's a learning process for all parties,” says Caroline.

Caroline says Minna is a driving force… a reminder for us to pause and breathe... to always focus on the here and now… that the smallest things overpower the big… to be humble... and to always practice humanity and instill it in your children.

“Would we change things if we could? Yes, we would certainly want our daughter not to suffer. However, we would never trade our experience or the path that she has graced us with.”

Support Minna: rettgive.org/campaigns/mission-minna/

bestbuddies.org