“Your identity is not something you have to earn,” says Michele D. Anderson, MA. “You are more than what has happened to you, more than the roles you carry, more than your greatest success and more than your greatest failure.”
That is the heart Anderson brings to her practice, The Identity Collective. With a master’s degree in Pastoral Counseling, along with experience as a Christian counselor, certified temperament counselor and master certified coach, Anderson began to recognize a common thread in the people she served: many did not really know who they were.
Anderson highlights how quickly identity can get muddled. “We allow experiences, relationships, rejection, success, failure, family expectations, culture and even other people’s opinions to tell us who we are. Eventually, those messages can become so familiar that we begin living from them.”
The Identity Collective grew from Anderson’s desire to help individuals, couples, families and communities understand who they are, understand one another and untangle the messages that have shaped their identity.
“For me, that foundation is understanding who God says we are and learning to live from that truth—not simply knowing it intellectually, but allowing it to influence our relationships, decisions, boundaries, emotional health, purpose and the way we see ourselves,” says Anderson.
“When that becomes the foundation, we no longer have to spend our lives constantly asking, ‘Am I enough? Do they approve of me? Do I belong?’”
Anderson has seen the impact of identity work in her clients. As they gain greater clarity about who they are, they often become more confident in setting healthy boundaries, communicating their needs and making decisions that align with their faith and values.
It is never too late to begin discovering who you are. Anderson offers practical steps to help people become more aware of the messages shaping their identity and begin living in alignment.
Pay attention. “One of the simplest practices is to begin paying attention to the messages you repeatedly tell yourself. Ask, ‘Is this actually true? Where did I learn this? Is this how God sees me?’”
Focus on strengths. “We tend to be very aware of our weaknesses, but many people struggle to name what is good, strong or valuable about themselves.”
Create space. “Even 10 intentional minutes can help us become less reactive and more aware of what is happening internally.”
Understand boundaries. “Another important practice is learning that healthy boundaries are not rejection. Sometimes becoming healthier means recognizing what belongs to us and what does not. We can love people deeply without assuming responsibility for everyone’s emotions, choices or expectations.”
Permission to grow gradually. “We often want transformation to happen immediately, but meaningful change usually happens through small choices repeated consistently.”
Anderson’s work at The Identity Collective continues to expand to meet the needs of the community through its programs.
The Identity Project is a faith-based group experience designed to help participants understand who they are in Christ and learn to live from that truth.
Three Strands is a faith-based relationship program that combines temperament assessments and guided relationship work to help couples and families understand their differences, communicate more effectively and strengthen their connection.
Anderson also speaks and teaches at churches and other organizations on identity, relationships and faith.
“My hope is that people walk away from any interaction with The Identity Collective knowing that their story matters, their relationships are worth investing in, and it is never too late to grow into a healthier understanding of who God created them to be.”
Learn more at TheIdentityCollective.org or contact Anderson at michele@theidentitycollective.org.