make is choosing a different room.”
There is a point every year when the calendar starts looking a little ridiculous.
Holiday parties. Networking events. Client dinners. School events. End-of-year celebrations. And at least three texts that say, “We HAVE to get together before the year ends!”
Suddenly, your calendar is packed, your inbox is overflowing and you are wondering when and why exactly you agreed to all of this.
Sound familiar?
I am a big believer in showing up. I am also a big believer in knowing where you are showing up and why.
I promise you, not every room deserves your time.
Ask Yourself: Why Am I Going?
Before you automatically say yes to the next invitation, ask yourself a very simple question: What am I hoping to get out of this?
Maybe it is business. Maybe it is meeting someone who could open a door. Maybe it is reconnecting with someone you genuinely enjoy. Or maybe you just need two hours where nobody needs you to fix anything, or a small child is grabbing at your leg.
All valid reasons.
But know your reason before you walk through the door.
Your time is valuable. Your energy is valuable. And this time of year, your bandwidth is especially valuable.
The Right Room Matters
This is a big part of why I created The Vault, a dinner series built around meaningful connection and intentional networking.
I wanted to create the kind of room where you can actually have a conversation. Not the room where you spend two hours collecting business cards you will never look at again, or you’re standing there awkwardly because you don’t know anyone.
At our first dinner in June, 6 and 7 figure business women walked in not knowing one another and left being vulnerable with each other of the struggles they are facing, finding a community and feeling more inspired than ever. If you have seen some of the photos, you may have even spotted a few familiar Frederick faces.
That was the whole idea.
The right room does not have to be the biggest room, the fanciest room or the room with the most people in it.
It just needs to have the right people in it for you.
You Are Allowed to Say No
This gets a little harder around the holidays because guilt loves to dress itself up as an obligation.
You feel like you should go. You should support someone. You should make an appearance. You should squeeze in one more event.
But here is your permission slip from me: you do not have to.
You can skip the party that leaves you depleted and make room for the dinner that leaves you energized. You can decline the coffee that feels like an obligation and say yes to the conversation you have actually been looking forward to.
Nobody is giving out a prize for the fullest December calendar- trust me.
Take It With You Into 2027
The same principle applies to your business and work.
Every January, we set goals, make plans and convince ourselves that this is finally the year we are going to get it all together!
And then February happens (awkward silence).
I have worked with enough business owners to know that the problem is not always the goal. Sometimes you know exactly what you want. You just need someone to help you get there.
A coach. A mentor. An accountability partner. Someone who can see the things you are too close to see, help you create structure and, occasionally, call you out when you are getting in your own way. (Hi, it’s me!)
Sometimes you just need the dang help.
As you head into the holiday season and start thinking about 2027, take a look at your calendar, your circle and the rooms you keep walking into.
Ask yourself: Are these the rooms that support where I am trying to go?
If not, maybe your next strategic move is not another yes.
Maybe it is a no.