Steven Durant’s life completely changed on the night of December 7, 2016 when the West Bloomfield resident was in a car crash outside of Columbus, Ohio; a 20-year-old accidentally swerved into his car. Not only did Durant suffer serious physical ailments, but he lost his young daughter, Rosaria, who died after the accident. The Detroit native ended up retiring from his career as a supervisory examiner at the Federal Deposit Insurance Corporation (FDIC) and moving back to Michigan (where his family was) to receive care at Beaumont Hospital in Royal Oak.
All while grieving the loss of his daughter, Durant has spent the last five years not only working through health challenges like learning to walk again, being put on a feeding tube and giving himself daily injections, but he also got divorced. Despite it all, he says he’s choosing to be grateful— and he has his girlfriend (Ola Atchison) to thank for that. “Ola brought joy back into my life, as well as the will to live and to want more,” he explained. “And now, she has given me a blessing, our son, Olan. I can truly say I am happy.”
STEVEN, DESPITE THE TRAGEDIES YOU’VE FACED, YOU SAY YOU STILL FEEL GRATEFUL. WHY IS THAT? Feeling grateful did not happen overnight as I wanted to die after I was told Rosaria passed. It was my family, friends, neighbors and people I did not know who prayed and sent well wishes for my ex-wife and me, which led me to begin to feel grateful. It was the support of the nursing staff, chaplain, doctors, janitors and speech therapists that helped so much during that dark time. It was the funeral home that collaborated with Beaumont Hospital to allow me to have a private service with Rosaria before my seventh surgery. It was my brother-in-law who stayed with me nightly, not leaving my side. It was my best friend who brought his three-year-old son with him to the hospital and stayed with me on Christmas morning because he did not want me to be alone. It was my mother who opened her doors for 11 months and cared for me while I was in palliative care. It was my colleagues who donated countless hours to keep me in a paying position until long-term disability started. It is my home health aide, Bonnie, who has seen me at my worst since the accident and encourages and cares for me. And finally, I met the beautiful Ola, who came into my life while I was going through a contentious divorce.
OLA, HOW DID YOU MEET STEVEN, AND WHAT ATTRACTED YOU TO HIM? I met Steven via Facebook of all places. He began stalking my page (I say this jokingly, but it’s true!) after he saw a picture of me on a mutual friend's page. He inboxed me, asking if we met before. That was the beginning of our love story. We met face-to-face for the first time when he offered to drop off PPE to my home. At that time in the pandemic, PPE was hard to come by. Our physical attraction was on point the very first moment we laid eyes on each other. We couldn't stop cheesing at one another. Although we only met that time for five minutes, I'll never forget that beautiful moment.
STEVEN, ALTHOUGH I’M SURE YOU’RE HEAD OVER HEELS IN LOVE WITH OLAN, THIS HAS TO ALSO BRING BACK SOME MEMORIES OF ROSARIA WHEN SHE WAS FIRST BORN. HOW ARE YOU STAYING POSITIVE? I get emotional quite a bit as my Olan resembles Rosaria. I miss her terribly. Both their birthdays are in September. There is a song that I would sing to her as a baby that I now sing to Olan with minor changes to it. I know she is watching over her little brother. I talk to her throughout the day as I have since her death. Rosaria would want me to move forward, but I am doing [what I am to keep] her memory alive. Olan will learn about his sister. I have made a point to support worthy charities and organizations in Rosaria's name. What helps me cope? I have two psychologists, one of which I speak with every week. I find comfort by visiting her crypt and talking to her.
OLA, WHY DID YOU TWO DECIDE TO NAME YOUR BABY OLAN? My name, Ola, is a family name. I'm named after my maternal grandmother, Ola Mae Price, since most people in my family are named after someone in the family. In the past, I would tell family members to name their sons after me and name them Olan. They would laugh and say no way. When Steven and I were discussing names for our son, I mentioned Olan and was quite surprised [that] he loved it instantly. Our son's middle name is Asher, which is after Steven's middle name, Ashley. Olan Asher has a piece of us both in his name.
STEVEN, WHAT ADVICE DO YOU HAVE FOR THOSE IN OUR COMMUNITY WHO FACE A TRAGEDY? Cherish and wrap your arms around family, friends and people who genuinely care and support you. Talk about your feelings. Seek professional counseling or group therapy immediately if you need it. Crying is a way to release, so I encourage it. Identify something that brings you comfort during a hard period or moment, and focus on that. Do not sweat the small stuff. Do not be afraid to express yourself. Finally, just breathe and embrace life and everyone you love.