Jessica A. McCarthy, Psy.D.
What are some signs that a child may be experiencing anxiety or stress, and how can parents effectively address these concerns?
For older children and teens, anxiety or stress often manifests as a noticeable shift in behavior. Parents may observe their child becoming more withdrawn, clingy, irritable, or disengaged from activities they once enjoyed or friends they used to spend time with. Children may also resist going to school or struggle with daily routines, such as bedtime or getting ready in the morning.
To address these concerns, parents can start by having open conversations with their child, especially if they already have a history of discussing feelings and stress. Parents can ask what’s been bothering them or express concern about changes in behavior. For children who find it difficult to verbalize their feelings, journaling or drawing can be great alternatives. These non-verbal outlets provide a safe, non-confrontational way for children to express themselves and may give parents insight into potential sources of stress.
Parents can also introduce techniques like mindfulness, breathing exercises, or sensory tools to help children manage their emotions. However, if anxiety persists or begins to significantly affect daily functioning, it may be helpful to consult a mental health professional to explore the underlying causes further.
How can parents create a supportive environment at home to help children manage their emotions and mental health?
A supportive home environment begins with parents modeling emotional regulation. Children are highly receptive to the emotional atmosphere around them and learn how to manage their feelings by observing adults. While it’s important for parents to model healthy emotional expression, it’s also crucial to maintain appropriate boundaries—children should not bear the emotional weight of their parents’ struggles.
One way to normalize emotional expression is for parents to share their own experiences in an age-appropriate way. For example, saying, “Sometimes I feel sad too. When that happens, here’s what helps me,” can make it easier for children to open up about their own feelings.
It’s also important to avoid minimizing a child’s feelings with phrases like “just get over it” or “don’t worry about it.” Validating their emotions helps children feel seen and understood, empowering them to express their concerns and seek support.
How can parents initiate conversations about mental health with their children, and why is this important?
Creating an open dialogue about emotions and mental health begins with establishing an environment where these topics are not taboo. Parents should encourage their children to talk about their feelings and validate their experiences, without dismissing or minimizing them. Sometimes, a direct conversation is the most effective approach.
Family activities, especially physical ones like walking, can provide a less formal setting for discussing emotions. Physical activity reduces stress and often makes it easier for children to talk. Play is another great way to foster connection and open conversations. Through play, children may feel more comfortable expressing their feelings and parents can model healthy emotional regulation (e.g., handling frustration during a game).
Parents should also recognize that these conversations may feel uncomfortable at times. Cultivating emotional tolerance—both for their own feelings and those of their children—is crucial for building strong emotional connections.
Tara Donatiello, LAC, NCC
What role does play therapy have in supporting children’s mental health, and how can parents incorporate play into emotional learning?
Play therapy is an effective tool for addressing emotional and social challenges in children. Since play is the primary way children communicate, it allows them to express their feelings in a safe, structured environment. Play therapy also helps children build self-awareness, coping skills, and emotional regulation.
Parents can incorporate play into emotional learning simply by engaging in play with their children. Whether it’s imaginative play, board games, or physical activities, play helps children process emotions, develop problem-solving skills, and learn how to manage their feelings in real-world situations.
Can you share effective strategies for helping children cope with changes or transitions, especially as we approach the new year?
Preparing children for upcoming changes is key to reducing anxiety. While we can’t always anticipate every change, giving children advance notice and talking through upcoming transitions helps them feel more in control. For example, when planning family events or changes in routine, provide children with a heads-up and remind them as the change approaches.
Where possible, involve children in decision-making, allowing them to feel included in the process. Additionally, ensure that their schedules include unstructured downtime for play and relaxation, which is vital for emotional balance.
What resources or activities do you recommend for parents looking to enhance their child’s resilience and emotional well-being?
One of the most effective ways to enhance emotional resilience is by ensuring children have ample time for free, unstructured play. This allows them to navigate and process their emotions in a natural, stress-free way.
Parents can also introduce activities that promote social-emotional learning. For example, keeping a family gratitude jar, where everyone adds notes about what they’re thankful for, can be a great way to cultivate positivity. Another favorite activity is "Rose, Thorn, Bud," where each family member shares something positive (“rose”), something challenging (“thorn”), and something they’re looking forward to (“bud”).
Books like Today I Feel Silly by Jamie Lee Curtis and Breathe Like a Bear by Kira Willey can help children better understand and express their emotions. Online resources such as Sesame Workshop and the Kids Mental Health Foundation offer valuable tools and materials to support children’s emotional development.
For more personalized guidance, parents may also consider reaching out to a licensed mental health professional specializing in working with children at elementspsych.com.