With the new year upon us, it’s a perfect time to focus on creating change in our relationships. If you’re single, you may be wondering how to find a truly fulfilling, healthy relationship. For those who are committed, how do you and your partner do the work to sustain a healthy, passionate, tangible couplehood?
Making conscious resolutions within your relationship (or your quest for one) can keep you from falling into the same patterns and instead, ensure that you elevate your dating or love life to a higher level. If you prioritize what you want, the best and most fulfilling relationship could be on the horizon for you in 2024.
So, how do you make it happen?
Change your attitude. Spot the recurring, limiting beliefs that you have about yourself and/or your ability to find true love. LOVE YOURSELF FIRST. Practice being hopeful.
Learn from past lessons in dating. Take steps to acknowledge the patterns in your dating decision-making that continue to not serve you. It’s a choice – make a proactive commitment to date differently.
Choose openly, yet wisely. Be open to those who don't check ALL your boxes, but create a list of 6 of the most crucial traits and characteristics that your future partner must have – and stick to them. With each consecutive date, take the temperature of your 6 must-haves and use them as a compass. You can avoid wasting A LOT of time by not accepting a date with anyone who doesn't accurately embody or meet those criteria that you KNOW are deal-breakers.
Stop making excuses for people. People will tell you early on who they are through their actions. Take accountability for yourself if you have turned a blind eye or made excuses for bad behavior. Also, stop making excuses for yourself. There's nothing wrong with spending a year casually dating if that’s what you want. However, continuing to casually hang out with someone you know doesn't work for you in the long term will take up space and energy in your life, and theirs, blocking you both from meeting the right one.
Be kind to yourself, always. And remember what you’re thankful for.
Embrace something that your partner loves and you don’t. A huge part of being a good partner is being willing to try new things and embrace your partner by opening yourself up to something that they enjoy.
Remind your partner what you love about them. We often forget that our partner needs positive reinforcement. You may feel they already know, but your partner needs to hear it, so if he/she is looking great that day, tell them! If your SO is doing something helpful, tell that person how much you appreciate it. If he/she is working hard, mention to your partner how proud you are.
Don’t underestimate the power of simple moments. A car ride, a coffee date, a movie on the sofa; it’s vital to make time to reconnect.
Take pride in how you look for each other and take intimacy outside of the bedroom. A different part of the house or a change of venue can be all it takes to make romance fun again!
Check in on your partner’s feelings. Communication and respect are the key to a healthy relationship and the glue that holds a bond tightly together.