As the Visionary Founder of Mickie's Miracles, I can reflect on a chapter of my life that forever changed me, where fear and surrender intertwined in the face of pediatric epilepsy.
It was 11 years ago when the waiting room became a vessel for terror with monitors beeping and unfamiliar medical jargon echoing through the halls as my husband Gabriel, my almost one-year-old daughter Mikayla and I were awaiting direction from her pediatric epileptologist for treatment options to stop her infantile spams — among the most catastrophic seizures infants can suffer.
Standing amid the fluorescent lights, my eyes sensitive to their glare, I paced anxiously. The four hours leading up to that moment felt like an out-of-body experience, filled with flashes that play before me like scenes from a movie. Our daughter's neurologist appeared in the doorway, her voice firm as she asked questions about my daughter's last meal. In a heartbeat, we were told she required emergency surgery for her swelling brain.
My husband and I held onto hope, praying over our little girl as we sang "you are my sunshine" while the anesthesiologist prepared her for her second surgery in as many days. The trauma of those moments resonated deep within us. We had been battling our baby's catastrophic pediatric epilepsy diagnosis for nine months, desperately trying to halt the relentless seizures that ravaged her developing brain.
Every day, we witnessed clusters of spasms, living in a constant state of fear. But in that waiting room, as I sank to my knees, a different prayer emerged. This prayer was not like the ones I had recited daily, pleading for a miracle to save my daughter's life. No, this prayer was an acknowledgment of surrender.
In the face of my deepest and darkest fear, the illusion of control shattered. I stood face to face with the reality that my daughter's life hung in the balance. Helpless and vulnerable, I cast aside my desperation and thanked God for the greatest blessing of my life – for allowing me to love and nurture her. I recognized that she was His, and I embraced the honor of being her Mommy.
I did not question "why me?" Instead, I relinquished my grip on certainty. In that cold waiting room, a palpable fear transformed into an unfathomable peace. I didn't know how the story would unfold; I only knew that I would never be the same. The woman who knelt in surrender would emerge forever changed.
Today, as the CEO of Mickie's Miracles, I channel my experience with my daughter - who has now been seizure free for 10 years - and my faith into raising awareness for pediatric epilepsy and supporting families like ours at every step of the way when they need it most. From advocacy to mental health support to providing community for them, we work tirelessly to create miracles like Mickie for others.
As we celebrate Epilepsy Awareness Month, which takes place every November, that commitment is steadfast and continues to burn as bright as ever. We invite you to learn about epilepsy — a disease that affects more people than cerebral palsy, autism, Alzheimer’s and Parkinson’s combined. And should you know a family struggling to find answers for their seizing child, we ask you to share this story and provide our contact information with them — MickiesMiracles.org.
We thank God for guiding us through the darkest of times and allowing Mickie's Miracles to bring hope, support and life-saving advocacy for infants and children impacted by pediatric epilepsy.