Five female amigos from the Frisco/Prosper area, who've been friends for 20 years, are documenting their life journeys while publicly sharing their views about the importance of female friendships and "the real struggles of this thing we call the mom life!"
These mommas claim to be experts on besties' trips and friendship fun, and they pledge to keep discussing topics other than those just about the 12 children among them.
Monica Pittenger, Kellie Matijasevic, Tammine Mercer, Jill McMillan and Jenny Dean know how important it is to have time away with friends. After all, they all knew each other before kids, husbands and careers, so Monica confides that it's nice to get together and just “be." Indeed, Tammine and Jill have been friends since eighth grade, so they've perfected how to "be together," too.
All of them attended college together at Texas Tech. Jenny and Jill are sisters, with Jenny being 18 months younger.
"We joked for the longest time that Jenny was our mascot, but she has been around since college, and she feels like a sister to all of us now," explains Monica.
All five of these women have professions, so they are straightforward and candid about pinpointing the challenges of having competing primary concerns. "A good balance comes from having friends and making them one of your priorities," says Jill.
They admit finding time to hang out together without their individual families is challenging, and that planning once-a-month meals out is crucial, so they can accommodate the ebbs and flows of their schedules. They enlist each other as sounding boards and say it avoids ever feeling alone to face the world.
How do their husbands feel about this? The women say the men are supportive, even getting sad when they aren't invited. In fact, their spouses started their own Instagram but forgot the password to it, so have a hard time keeping up with the antics of their wives, who now have quite a social media following. And when they're in bad moods, their husbands say: "Go call the girls."
"Kids are all-consuming, but sometimes we need to recharge. That's why we plan our trips a year in advance, so that weekend is booked and scheduled around," says Monica.
They admit they sometimes get "mom shamed" online by a few other women because they are spending time with each other rather than with their kids. But, their viewpoint is that couples should "parent" together, so it's not "babysitting when fathers take turns" with the children.
Likewise about finding time to be just married couples and having date nights. Four of The Fab Five turned 40 years old last year, so they included their husbands in all the celebrations. While they concede that striking a balance between being loving spouses, caring mothers and good friends can seem overwhelming, it's all about determining priorities and following through with them.
Girls' trips are good for one's health in that they release happy hormones. One study published in Behaviour found that hanging out with friends to nurture "peaceful associations" can help release oxytocin, a neurotransmitter known as the love or trust hormone. More oxytocin is released when with friends, which can make one feel more happy, trusting, generous and friendly overall.
TOP 5 TIPS FROM FAB FIVE CHICKS FOR PLANNING A FUN GIRLS' TRIP
- DATE: Pick a date early, at least six months in advance if possible. Planning around the birthdays of our 12 children and husbands can be very difficult. If you add in anniversaries and preplanned family trips, there are not many weekends left.
- LOCATION: Once the date is picked, pick a location. We have a bucket list of places we want to go, and we usually pick a place from our list. We also decide on the next trip location during a girls' trip, that way we can really talk it out and figure out what is best for our group.
- CREW: Keep your crew in mind when planning the trip. If someone in your group is pregnant, going to Napa is not the best destination.
- ACTIVITIES: Do something memorable each trip; it can be small like visiting a famous restaurant or something big like a concert, or be adventurous and go zip lining.
- HAVE GRACE: Remember, the most important part of the trip is to reconnect with your friends and make some memories. The little things, like where to go for dinner or what hotel to stay in are not that important. (Unless the hotel has an amazing pool or spa, of course!) Be real. Be you! Have fun.
Bonus Trip Tip: They love to take little items for each other, such as matching cups, hats, pajamas, makeup bags, or even sweatshirts for the plane rides home.
Instagram: @fabfivechicks
